Pushing For New Experiences To Drive Personal Growth & Realizing I’ve Been Operating Out Of Fear

This is is part of my live-learning series! I will be updating this post as I continue through my journey. I apologize for any grammatical errors or incoherent thoughts. This is a practice to help me share things that are valuable without falling apart from the pressure of perfection. 

Speak With Tyler Bryden
Speak With Tyler Bryden
Pushing For New Experiences To Drive Personal Growth & Realizing I've Been Operating Out Of Fear
  • Pushing for new experiences to create personal growth
  • The realization that I’ve been operating from a place of fear
  • Drive to overcome that fear and move forward with confidence

#longweekend #realization #breakthrough #buildinpublic #toronto #portcredit #personalgrowth #growth

YouTube Video


Automated Transcription

Hello hello hello Tyler Bryden here hope everything’s going well coming off a long weekend and video Bay a little bit different today. Lots of I mean lots of crazy stuff going on in the world right now that I’m sure I’ll be touching on later this week. But today just wanted to sort of reflect on a long weekend and I think what I purposely try to do and something that I’ve I’ve tried to do in many instances but sort of executed this weekend a little bit better was to put myself into some environments and some circumstances that have not necessarily always in and so. The reason that I try to do that is to when you push yourself into uncomfortable situations. Sometimes that then allows you to experience new versions of yourselves, or parts of you that you might not normally experience. So I did that in a few ways. I’ll show 1 little clip here. See if this works. So this is a video of me.

I. Come on in the 90s. So brightly. Anyways, now for that. So. So that was a friend’s event. The print on brought a bunch of musicians together and they jammed in a room and it was a little bit of a drive. It was late on a Friday night and and you know, very easy to just sort of stay at home and relax. Do nothing but that emphasis on sort of the long weekend and pushing those experience. Sort of driving me to go out there and then when you drive out that far then you know you’re almost going to.

They sort of have to wrap. You have to do a little freestyle and this is something I’ve been a huge. You know, I’ve loved doing my whole life, but you know, as you get a little bit older as life sort of winds and works through the way that it does, you start to stop having these experiences or getting these opportunities. But one of the realizations that I had through this moment was, you know, I I did. OK there. I’ve definitely lost. It’s a skill set that you have to practice for sure, and the people who have continued our incredibly good but.

One thing I realized was that I was operating out of a place of fear and. You know, like anything you can sort of extrapolate. That micro experience and put it into a little bit more of a. Macro view on yourself and and what’s going on in your life and so from so for myself here, that moment where I realize, OK, I can. I’m wrapping here, but I can’t even look up. I can barely look up. I can’t look in the eyes of the people who are standing and watching. I can’t, you know I can barely look at the musicians who are actually playing around playing with me and actually jamming and helping me have that moment. And then with that also this sort of anxiety and fear of.

Not being able to express myself in the full form and and that was all sort of encapsulated in this moment while freestyling and and then what was really nice led to sort of like a cascade of of sort of realizations and breakthroughs over the weekend and and and really that realization again was that for for so long I have been operating out of fear and one of the videos that got shared last week was a video. From ray Christian. He has had a podcast called Psychedelic Diaries and through that experience I talked about some of my own journey with psychedelics. And unfortunately, you know, maybe I shouldn’t use the word unfortunately, but a really sort of dark traumatic time in my life where I ended up. As you know, inpatient in the hospital and really having to go through a journey of self discovery and understanding that there there is. It’s very easy to turn on this mechanism of darkness.

In your life, and if you don’t take care of things that are sort of haunting you or. Are causing pain suffering. Then you can those those that pain can build up until you have moments of collapse and unfortunately that was so dark for me that. That as I proceeded through through the next seven years, and that’s sort of what brings me to date. Many times I’ve been operating out of a fear of going back to that place, and I think that’s a big limiter on the way that you take risk on the way that you do things on how you operate. Every moment of your life. And then every decision that is made and then through so through this sort of again micro activity that I I tried to push myself to do, there was the.

Recognization, the realization the recognition of this and then the the goal to then remedy, remedy that and. I look back and I see other ways that this has actually sort of take been influenced or grown, and one of those has been actually being an entrepreneur. And when you are an entrepreneur it’s weird because I look at that place operating under that place of fear and sometimes a lot of times I would say that fear is the instability that comes with starting and running your own business, not having necessarily the most predictable stream of income or challenges to the business. Everything that comes with that and for myself, that has been sort of intensified by COVID when the pandemic first came. And lost a huge amount of customers and clients there. And you know, experienced a huge revenue drop and then had to build that up from scratch all over again and then now have seen volatility in the markets turning towards recession. You know it much more difficult place to fundraise and get the valuation that you are as a company.

All that sort of creates this sort of instability in operating out of fear, and then to add on to that during a couple of those difficult times. I then took. Alone, which was an important one, but a a future printer BC which has personal liability on it, and I’m luckily it looks like I have the ability to pay this off. Which is also this place of freedom that then comes where you can operate more clearly and and and freely not knowing that if things go wrong, or if if whatever happens, that there is not this large lump sum of personally liable money on you and and that you know having that moment having that freedom coming come is is then all combined for this sort of. Now a realization or breakthrough that has sort of occurred over the weekend, and that I hope to continue through and. And this is not going to be like, like, you know, having this realization. And then it’s just oh now I’m just going to operate in full confidence and and and move forward without any fear. This is going to be, you know, an upward climb with fall offs and and in moments where I’m not necessarily.

Fulfilling that intention, fulfilling that operation. And that’s OK. That’s part of the journey, and in general there are many reasons to be scared. There are many reasons to have fear, so you can’t expect that at all times, but that intention, that realization that focus can help a lot, and it’s not going to be. You know, I take myself back to a day in my childhood when things were different. You don’t have the same understanding of the world and you know it was a competitive hockey player. Things going well, you know good in school, good with friends, good with girls, all this. And then this overconfidence develops. And with that overconfidence that that can put you in a lot of difficult places too. And so I actually, while I say that operating out of fear has has been, you know.

It’s limited me from a lot of things. It’s also that self awareness of risk that self awareness of what can go wrong has also made me. I think overall a more it’s giving me a better risk profile and I think just overall it’s made me a better person. It’s made me less arrogant. It’s made me more over, you know, less overconfident, more likely to ask difficult questions, ask questions to myself, consider why I’m doing something and then also you know lose that night.

City that I can do anything that I want and and again conflict there because you want to have belief in yourself, but you also have to see your own limits. You have to see when that cannot necessarily be when that belief that optimism can actually be on the underline of delusional and and then not to follow those things and to make sure that you’re always assessing and making the right choices as best you can. So that realization has been I’m very happy with that realization. It took, you know, again, took some. It took some time here and I got a nice little picture. I’ll share this with the zoom in a nice picture of Monica watching the this is me freestyle Tasia also watching me freestyle and looking slightly concerned. I don’t know if he knew what I was talking about there. That’s OK Sir. We love you and maybe one day you’ll like my raps but maybe not today and then just one last thing. I think to push this barrier it was.

Went to us the first time I went to this electric island here in Toronto, and so this is sort of what you got to see. You know I had my first sort of experience like. I mean at Burning Man, which was really my sort of first festival kind of thing. And I learned a lot there. I think you know, at this event, not as much learning because you’re not forced into the desert for seven days. And it’s not, you know, survival isn’t a mechanism. This was like a day, you know, a day trip that you go and you dance and have have some fun. But there was a moment where it was cold. It was like looking like it was about to rain. It was like, you know, Monica, I’m like, do we even want to be here? Should we? Should we stay or should we just go and and you know, even with some of that.

Again, an intention to push. Push yourself, push myself through through the weekend. It was like, OK, let’s get up. You know, if we we can sit here and we can be cold, we can worry about the rain and we cannot have fun. Or we can go join a crowd. We can dance and we can forget about that stuff and then see how we how we feel and what we realize you get in the crowd. You dance. It’s warm. Everyone’s having a good time. Everyone’s there to to to you know create good energy dance. Have fun.

And and then, once you start to get in those crowds and the music is going, you forget about everything else. And so I’m very happy that we sort of took that. You know that that moment where we could have just gone home and said, this is, I know this is uncomfortable blah blah blah. And it is that we said, OK, let’s give this a try. Let’s have some fun and and push this as much as we can and ended up staying until the very end. Lights everything was awesome. Awesome event overall. And it was another sort of realization of just you have to make your own.

Energy you have to make your own fun. It’s really easy to just sit there and be unhappy or sad or just not enjoying the moment. But if you can and you can push yourself, you can turn anything into a positive you can. You can turn bad energy and channel it into good energy and have a great time. So I know those are a couple things that.

This sort of came through this weekend. I hope you also had an experience to have a good weekend there and enjoy the long weekend here in Canada. I know Americans is next weekend and you know, I just encourage you. If you can push yourself into some of these uncomfortable situations because you can in those uncomfortable situations, you learn more about yourself and even a micro moment can become a sort of impactful thing in your life that helps you move forward with more clarity. And that’s what I’m doing as you know.

Working to operate to stop operating out of this place of fear and move towards a place of confidence and continue that. Continue to share insights along the way. Continue to grow and I appreciate everyone who supported me on that journey very much. So thank you for checking this out. I hope you have a great rest of your day and all the best and everything that that you are taking on. I hope that you can also operate out of a place of confidence. Thank you.


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